


Pros and Cons

by Saraiguma



Category: Skullgirls
Genre: F/F
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2015-07-29
Updated: 2015-07-29
Packaged: 2018-04-11 20:14:51
Rating: Explicit
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 1
Words: 2,365
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/4450688
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/Saraiguma/pseuds/Saraiguma
Summary: <blockquote class="userstuff">
              <p>Valentine and Parasoul run into each other at an anime convention and make out in a bathroom. I sincerely apologize for it</p>
            </blockquote>





	Pros and Cons

 Canopticon was here again and Valerie was in her element. Not that she was ever OUT of her element, but here she was especially in it. Between her ninja training and encyclopedic knowledge of every release in the past 10 years there was no one more capable than her.

 

She knew the swag she wanted, she knew the panels to attend, and she knew the autographs she needed to get. Everything was meticulously planned for, even budgeting time for the many pictures people wanted of her _flawless_ Emi Nozomi cosplay. Nothing would distract her from her mission, noth- HOTTIE AT TEN O'CLOCK.

 

Valerie nonchalantly pretended to browse through a collection of Suiei Yujin Pawa yaoi doujin while assessing the situation. Mid-to-late 20s, red hair, amazing rack, and a serviceable Annie of the Stars cosplay. She was with what was obviously her little sister, dressed in a seemingly store-bought Sagan costume, and two Black Egret cosplayers were skulking nearby, though they appeared to be stalkers rather than companions.

 

The girl manning the table gave her a smile with her change, Valerie nodded and put the Hozuki/Ryuusaki doujin in her bag, if she was going to go off schedule she'd need to make up for it somehow. She put the finishing touches on the plan even as she knelt before the young girl, noting the subtle shifting of the pair's stalkers even before she began talking.

 

“That's a fantastic cosplay!” Valerie cheerfully said, making sure to let her smile reach her eyes “Did you make it yourself? You're definitely the cutest Sagan I've seen all weekend!”

 

“Hardly” the pink haired girl rolled her eyes and pulled at the costume disdainfully “My sister offered me 50 Bones and sundaes for dinner for a week if I came here with her, I got her to double it if I dressed in this dumb outfit.”

 

Valerie looked up at the redhead and her unexpectedly angry expression caused her to lose any semblance of control she might have otherwise had.

 

“ _You_ watch Annie?” Valerie's mocking laughter seemed to cause the other woman physical pain “I can't believe an actual _adult_ watches that entry level garbage, let alone would let other people know they do.”

 

“Annie of the Stars is a _fantastic_ show” the redhead carefully enunciated through grit teeth “it has compelling plotlines, deep characterization, and a message of friendship and acceptance that is wonderful for _all_ ages!”

 

“It's unapologetic tripe made for children!” Valerie knew they were drawing the eye of the crowd , she would never admit it, but she was having fun “boring trash made for neckbeards and SJWs whose hair dye has seeped into their brain”

 

Valerie thought she might have been too blatant with that last line, but was incredibly please with herself as the other woman hefted the faux sword and began charging her. This was entirely worth the panels she'd end up missing for it.

 

The other woman's seemingly berserker charge contained a hint of combat training, and Valerie was definitely intrigued. She slid her legs apart, properly distributing her weight as she weighed her options.

 

Right hand wrist break left palm solar plexus right elbow skull? That would end this altercation entirely too quickly, and that's never any fun. Valerie ran through a few more plausible scenarios then settled on simply breaking the swords momentum with her left hand and delivering a weak jab to her opponents armpit, to let this wannabe Girl of the Stars actually show her stuff.

 

Before the two made contact though, the Black Egret cosplayers managed to catch up to the girl and stop her momentum, one grabbing around her midsection and shoulders and the other standing in front of her with their hands up.

 

“Let me go you imbeciles!” the redhead was nearly frothing now “I am going to _END_ this unappreciative shithead!”

 

“Calm down ma-uh-miss, you're causing a scene” the first egret tried to gesture to the gathering crowd without loosening her grip.

 

The redhead suddenly froze, glancing around with her one uncovered eye as if seeing the packed hall for the first time. She stiffly straightened her back, pausing for a moment as if to gather her thoughts. Looking for all the world as though she were royalty, she adjusted her eyepatch and gave a haughty sniff before turning on her heel and marching away. The view from behind made Valerie wish she had kept her mouth shut.

 

 

Valerie walked into the bathroom with a yawn. She had just dropped her haul in her room and in her rush to return to the floor she had forgotten to use her bathroom. Not that big a deal, she quickly did her business, making sure to meticulously wash her hands afterwards, a ninja nurse is still a medical professional after all. Once she was satisfied she set her mask on top of the paper towel dispenser so she could splash her face with some cold water to try and wash away the tiredness that always seeped into day 3.

 

She braced herself against the sink with both hands and looked into the mirror, mentally going over her lists of what she had gotten and what she had not, artists in the alley that might give a last minute discount, and whether she still had a chance of not getting skunked.

 

As she turned to retrieve her mask she saw the door open, and gave a small grin as she saw a familiar Annie of the Stars cosplay enter the bathroom.

 

“Hey there princess” Valerie's smile was genuine this time “I'm surprised your bodyguards let you come in here without checking it out first”

 

The woman's face quickly shifted from anger to shock to confusion, apparently put off-balance by a simple barb. Valerie could use that to her advantage. Before she could press her advantage the redhead seemingly recovered her poise.

 

“I'm sorry about earlier” though she didn't seem happy to be apologizing, the other woman certainly came across as genuine “You gave your opinion and I got upset, Annie of the Stars is just an important show to me so I hate to hear anyone unfairly criticize it.”

 

“Unfairly? Honey that show is trash” Valerie shook her head nonchalantly “Besides that, if the show meant _that_ much to you your cosplay would probably be better”

 

The replica Annie puffed her chest out “Excuse me?”

 

Valerie perked up “Oh you didn't know?” she walked over to the other girl and began to literally point out the flaws as she named them “You're wearing the boots from Season 1 but you've got the trim inside out, you've got the black hairbands that she only wore in Season 3 during the Black Sun arc, your eyepatch has the updated insignia she earned in Season 7 after mastering the Rings of Saturn, and your pouch is the design from the “Slayer of Mercury” OVA which was _definitely_ not canon. So your costume is a patchwork quilt of incongruous designs, and besides that your Infinity Buster looks like it was made out of an umbrella and papier mache.”

 

The redhead was consumed with insulted spluttering before gathering herself and taking a deep breath “and how precisely would you know that, Ms 'Annie is Entry Level garbage?'”

 

“Oh I've seen all the episodes” Valerie nonchalantly replied “the difference is I know the show is bad and I only watch it ironically”

 

“Ironically?” the redhead's ire was visibly building again “That's not even a real thing. That is something people claim when they are embarrassed to watch something. That OVA wasn't even localized! You had to hunt down a bootleg version to even know about it!”

 

“Whatever you say Princess” Valerie's grin split her face “But it sounds like, ironic or not, I'm a better Annie fan than you”

 

Instantly the princess was in her face, eyepatch to eyepatch, with their foreheads nearly touching “Say that again” she growled

 

“I'm the better Annie fan” Valerie repeated “what are you going to do about it?”

 

The redhead merely growled, at a loss for words

  


“Well, I have an idea then” Valerie whispered before closing the small gap between them and planting a kiss on the other woman's lips, then brought her head back with a smirk and waited for a response.

 

The princess pressed forward, putting her lips to Valerie's and driving her tongue into Valerie's mouth. The ninja was surprised enough by this to let herself be pushed up against a wall, the princess placing herself firmly between her legs and wrapping her arms around her.

 

The princess wasted no time continuing her assault. Before Valerie could react there was a hand up her shirt, fingers tracing the curve of her spine and a hand up her skirt gently caressing her bottom. As a moan escaped her, muffled by the smothering softness of the princess's lips, she realized she needed to go on the offensive before she lost too much ground.

 

Valerie drove her own tongue past the princess's as one wandering hand found its home on the princess's ass and the other was drawn to the chest that had similarly drawn Valerie's attention earlier in the day. She enjoyed the gratifying shudder the princess gave as she firmly kneaded her breast with one hand and drew intimate lines with her fingers on the princess's panties.

 

Breaking the kiss and setting her teeth, the princess began undoing first the buttons on Valerie's blazer, then her shirt, revealing the simple white bra underneath. Valerie let out a low whine as the princess put her hands beneath the bra and began tender ministrations, and was reduced to feeble squirming as the shorter woman pinched her nipples and gently twisted them. The princess's face took on a gloating expression as Valerie struggled, panting, with her back arched and her feet barely touching the floor.

 

Gloating turned to a predatory hunger as the princess moved in for the killing blow, one hand slowly moving down Valerie's stomach and piercing the waistband of her skirt and panties alike.

 

Caught in a sudden burst of shame she grabbed the princess's wrist “I should probably warn you” she tried not to sound as vulnerable as she felt “that there's a surprise if you keep going”

 

The princess tilted her head for a second, curious as to what the bluenette could possibly mean. The sheepish, pensive expression on her face seemed uncharacteristic, as did the way she was nervously biting her lip.

 

Valerie watched as the princess's face cycled from confusion to understanding, then back to lust “Well a princess should always be prepared for the unexpected” she closed the distance between them again, placing their foreheads together again “as long as it's not an unpleasant surprise”

 

Before Valerie could answer the sound of a banging door and a high pitched shout interrupted them. Both women turned quickly to see the young pink-haired girl, still dressed as Sagan, turned away from them with her forearm in front of her eyes.

 

“Parasoul! what are you doing” despite not being able to see her face, it was painfully obvious she was somewhere between furious and mortified “this is a public bathroom!”

 

“Umbrella it's-” the princess started, before Valerie interjected.

 

“Parasoul?!” Valerie's laughter interrupted her attempts to get back into her clothes “you mean you actually _are_ the Princess? I guess that means those two weren't just cosplaying Black Egret soldiers, I thought those helmets looked a little too good”

 

Parasoul stammered and blushed, not able to even move, Valerie considered it fortunate that she wasn't exposed.

 

“Well it was fun Princess” she gave herself a glance in the mirror to ensure everything was tucked into place “I work at Lab 0 so give me a call if you ever want to have another conversation about anime” Umbrella groaned disgustedly at this

 

“Wait!” Parasoul shouted, finally recovered from her stupor “ _Please_ don't tell anyone about this, if people knew I was here doing this they'd never respect me. Everyone always thinks I'm too young and inexperienced as it is.”

 

“I never kiss and tell Princess” Valerie delivered a chaste peck on the cheek and rustled Umbrella's hair on her way out the door “Call me! Just ask for the nurse with the huge boobs, they'll transfer you to me!”

 

Left alone with her sister, Umbrella slowly turned around and peeked and, being satisfied she wouldn't see anything _else_ she wasn't supposed to see today, planted her fists on her hips in a stunning impersonation of her older sister when she was the one doing the lecturing.

 

“I can't believe you'd do something so reckless!” she wagged her finger admonishingly “think about if someone else had caught you! It would have been a scandal! Not to mention the fact that not even the nerdy Egrets you managed to drag here on the promise of secrecy would respect you if they found out!”

 

Parasoul sighed dejectedly “and what, precisely, do you want in exchange for your silence?”

 

“Ice cream for dinner for a month”

 

“Deal”

 

“also I want to drive a tank!” Umbrella had dropped any pretense of moral superiority by this point.

 

“What?” Parasoul shook her head “Do you know how dangerous that is? You don't-”

 

“Man, it would _really_ be a shame if Adam found out about this, wouldn't it?” Umbrella's devious smile filled in the other half of that threat.

 

“Not like he hasn't has his share of trysts in men's rooms” Parasoul muttered under her breath

 

“What was that” Umbrella asked, not having heard her

 

“Nothing” Parasoul sighed, not seeing a way out of this in one piece “It's a deal”

 

“Fantastic!” Umbrella clapped her hands “Now can we leave”

 

“No, I still need to get Annie's autograph! and I didn't even find that limited edition Annie figure with replaceable weapons” Parasoul started ticking items off on her finger “or the mousepad, or the shot glass set, or the wall scroll, or-”

 

Umbrella had already tuned her out and was fantasizing about what she'd do in that tank. Even though she had to wear this dumb outfit and walk around with a bunch of nerds, she think she came out ahead this weekend.


End file.
